This friend's a friend forever
Wednesday, March 31, 1999
Jesus replied, "The one who has dipped his hand into the bowl with me will betray me."
I want nothing more than to be with Jesus and dip my hand into the bowl with his. To be with Jesus, to recline at supper with him, to walk the roads and listen to him speak about life and death, I can think of nothing else so satisfying and joyful.
Then today, and yesterday, and each day of my life, I betray my Lord. I have grown too old and too accustomed to this state of things to continue asking why, but I have not stopped repenting. My heart is broken daily, and I am the one who breaks it.
Judas was heartbroken the next day. I know how he felt. The sins of the night were laid bare in the morning. My betrayal and his are lit up with the lights of dawn.
But Jesus does not stop being my friend. He invites me back. He forgives me my sin of yesterday in the light of today. There is a new bowl of wine and new bread, Jesus provides a new meal for us to eat together.
I don't know what I would do without him.