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First things again and always

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Genesis 2:7 and 3:7
The Lord God formed man out of the clay of the ground and blew into his nostrils the breath of life, and so man became a living being ... then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized that they were naked ...

"Oh, to be in heaven." I yearn for an ideal future or indulge remembrance of things past: "O, to be in Eden." The place where there was no hint of exclusion. And all those psychological consequences of being left out had yet to stain and maim the humans God made. Shame (along with shame's mirror-opposite: arrogance), jealousy and self-pity were all unknown.

Alas, a chapter later all has changed. Adam's simple task of naming the animals takes a new turn. "What are you feeling, Eve?"

I feel ashamed. I am sad. I am afraid. I am angry, and I want to blame someone. Maybe YOU.

Yuck. Negativity, doubt, failure and finally rejection. New names for new experiences. The foundation of trust and obedience laid by Adam and Eve is fragile, to say the least. Cain and Abel stand on that foundation, and totter, and fall. So go the rest of us.

But the deepest part of me remembers the beginning. That thread of memory beckons to me. I long to accept and trust and obey. When I sit still and get quieter inside, I know God's love for me is complete and unchanging. I am safe with him.

God blocked the gates of Eden with his angels. For our own good, He said. Then he came out himself to be with us. The Spirit of God brings Eden with her. Jesus carries the kingdom of heaven in his words and in his touch. I might feel alone and forsaken at times, but not for long, and not for real.

The past and the future have got nothing on the present, not when God is right here, right now.

For real, God? You're with me right now? I believe, Lord. Help my unbelief. Show me the way to be quiet and know you, and let me let you do that in your time.



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