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Healing to live

Tuesday, March 27, 2001

John 5:1-16
When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, "Do you want to get well?"

Another time, another place Jesus says to an entire church, "I want you to be anything but mild-mannered and lukewarm. Be cold, be hot, be something! Want it! How bad do you want it!"

Sunday afternoon during Illinois' loss to Arizona in the biggest game of the year, I could read Coach Bill Self's lips on the TV, "WAKE UP!" How bad do you want this? Wake up!

Actually, as they tried too hard and things went wrong, his players were losing their team-ness. When basketball is beautiful it's because the players share/sacrifice/give/receive/let go/push hard.
They do this together. They lose themselves in this synergy and the result is a team/community/unit/organism. The whole is much greater than the sum of its parts, and I ooh and aah and marvel and call it beautiful.

The man Jesus was watching had no hope. He had stopped trying altogether. Self-pity whipped him and stripped him and hung him high. He had stopped wanting anything a long time ago, but Jesus' question must have awakened his spirit one more time.

I put myself in his place ... I become impatient very quickly when I have a cold that lasts more than a day, an attitude that doesn't lift after a nap or a meal. I've been putting various kinds of lotion and medicine on my hand for a year or so, and it's just getting worse. I have a friend whose depression is unpredictable but persistent, another who has cancer, another who is angry and doesn't get over it. How many human diseases and travails could I list here? What do you do when you are invaded, and the enemy just sits and sits on you, and you can't get up? Day after day?

The solution lies between the rock and hard place. At first I'm tempted by Scylla: trying too hard. Then when I try too hard without success I'll quit and give up and feel sorry for myself. Enter Charybdis. The path between is marked by surrender, rather than quitting. Working with Jesus rather than alone. Trying hard together.

Lord, we all want to be healed. Free us from demands that you heal on our terms and schedule, and free us then from apathy and despair when our demands are not met. Lord, we believe. Help our unbelief.



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